The following list was compiled by PFP board member and Free Library of Philadelphia employee Joel Nichols.
Let us know in the comments if there are other books you’d put on this list!
In addition to Amazon, please check your local bookstore such as Bindlestiff Books in West Philly, Big Blue Marble Book Store in Mt. Airy or Philly AIDS Thrift at Giovanni’s Room in Center City.
Story of Ferdinand: Leaf, Munro 1936
Little Blue and Little Yellow: Lionni, Leo 1962
Where the Wild Things Are: Sendak, Maurice 1963
A Color of His Own: Lionni, Leo 1975
The Paper Bag Princess: Munsch, Robert 1980
Tacky the Penguin: Lester, Helen 1990
Ella Sarah Gets Dressed: Chodos-Irvine, Margaret 2003
The Family Book: Todd Parr 2003
The Sissy Duckling: Fierstein, Harvey 2005
Rosie Revere Engineer: Beaty, Andrea 2005
10,000 Dresses: Ewert, Marcus 2008 (Some disagreement on our board over this book. What do you think?)
My Princess Boy: Kilodavis, Cheryl 2009
Cinnamon Baby: Winstanley, Nicola 2011
Mr. Tiger Goes Wild: Brown, Peter 2013
Wild: Hughes, Emily 2013
Not every princess: Bone, Jeffrey and Lisa 2014
This Day in June: Pitman, Gayle E. 2014
Jacob’s New Dress: Hoffman, Ian and Sarah 2014
Morris Micklewhite and the Tangerine Dress: Baldacchino, Christine 2014
Happy in Our Skin: Manushkin, Fran 2015
Red: a Crayon’s Story: Hall, Michael 2015
Worm Loves Worm: Austrian, J.J. 2016
You know PFP’s Family Matters Conference is coming up on Saturday, October 29 at the University of the Sciences in West Philly, but you might not know about these seven exciting things about this year’s event. (Seven since it’s our seventh annual…)
1. Staceyann Chin is our keynote speaker! Haven’t heard of her? She’s a lesbian activist and poet, Jamaican immigrant, single mom and author who’s been featured in the New York Times, on Oprah and is currently starring in her one-woman show in DC “Motherstruck!”
Along with her daughter, she started a series of “Living Room Protests” on YouTube addressing social issues of the day.
2. A staffperson from COLAGE will be there to runprogramming for kids, tweens and teens from 7 to 18 years old. They run the popular programming at Family Week in Provincetown.
(We also will have child care and activities for babies, toddlers and little kids 0-6.)
3. Workshops on everything from Queer Parenting 101 to Connecting with Your Kids toHow to be a Trans Ally to Social Justice and the Family. See the full list.
4. Info for prospective parents on your journey to parenthood, wherever you are in the process. Experts and professionals also will be on hand to talk about babymaking and adoption options.
5. The Treat Yourself space will be an option for adults again this year, with an added bonus of Yogibo bean bags for relaxing.
6. Mealtime this year will be in the USciences dining hall and is an all-you-can-eat brunch with options for vegan and gluten-free diets. This is included in the price of registration.
7. The event is very affordable, especially if you sign up by October 1 for our early registration fee. Adults who are PFP members are $20 each. Non-members are just $30. After Oct. 1, it’s $30/adult for PFP members and $40 for non-members. All kids 18 and under are free. Child care and brunch are included.
Register now at this link and please help us spread the word by sharing this blog post.
Welcome to all the #LGBTDNC delegates visiting Philadelphia this week. If you brought your kids, Philly Family Pride, the regional LGBTQ parents group, has a few tips for you on where to take the little (and not so little) ones. All are LGBT-parent friendly. First we’ll go through 5 indoor places under and then five places for the older kids.
Feel free to email PFP director Stephanie Haynes with questions at email@example.com.
5 places for under the under 5 set
It’s HOT, so we’re starting with three indoor places to beat the heat and have fun.
by Sandra Telep
Nearly a decade ago, when my partner and I first began to look into what our options were for starting a family, I was looking to connect with other LGBTQ families. I wanted to hear first hand experiences, get advice from parents who had walked this road, and connect with other prospective parents. Other LGBTQ families weren’t easy to find in the smaller city we resided in at the time, so I sought out community online.
Thanks to message boards I was able to connect with other families. From there I discovered a community of bloggers and started my own blog. I loved reading along with other families’ stories and sharing a bit of our own journey. These virtual friends were my tribe as I battled infertility, grieved losses, rejoiced in a long-awaited pregnancy and welcomed our first child into the world. Many of these friendships grew so strong and important that we made plans to meet face to face and introduce our families to each other, sometimes traveling significant distances to see the kids that we had dreamed about together all those years ago now playing together. Blogging for LGBTQ Families has been a lifeline for me.
Now, we live in Philadelphia, a much larger city, in a very LGBTQ friendly neighborhood with our six year old and three year old. We are surrounded by other LGBTQ families and our children have never known anything but a community of friends and neighbors made of all different types of families. I know how valuable that is to both us as parents, and our children as they come to understand the world we live in. This is one of the main reasons I serve on the board of Philadelphia Family Pride.
I know how lucky I was to begin my parenthood journey in the age of the internet…but I still had to search for and build my community. Philadelphia Family Pride helps build and nurture the community of LGBTQ families in Philly through social events and valuable educational resources for prospective parents and families. Our annual Family Matters Conference includes workshops on legal issues, financial planning, planning for parenthood, and social justice. We look forward to spending time with our friends at some of our favorite social events like camping, the aquarium, Smith Playground, the summer picnic or hiking. PFP really has been a treasure to our family.
Just recently I sat on a panel for one of our Maybe Baby group classes, and I was struck, looking around the room at the group of prospective parents. How amazing would it have been when we were researching parenthood to attend a class where we could talk to foster parents, reproductive technology specialists, parents that used known and anonymous donors, surrogacy agency representatives and other people trying to figure out how to build their families – all in one room! I love being a part of an organization that connects LGBTQ families with resources and each other.
Philly Family Pride, along with Equality Pennsylvania, the William Way LGBT Community Center and Philadelphia FIGHT sent the attached letter to all members of Philadelphia City Council on May 17, 2016, urging their support of Mayor Jim Kenney’s proposed sugary drinks tax of $.03/ounce.
This revenue would expand preK programs for Philadelphia’s underserved children, fund improvements in parks and recreation centers in the city, and pay for proposed community schools, and more.
As William Way’s Executive Director testified to on May 18, 2016 in front of Council:
“Though on the face of it universal pre-K may not seem like a top issue for LGBT citizens, I have made the case to the LGBT community and its allies that the fate of our educational system is the most pressing issue for LGBT citizens, and all Philadelphians. Universal pre-K will help to level the playing field so that LGBT children, and particularly LGBT children of color, have improved opportunities for their education and thus for their success in society.”
In Chris’ written testimony, he also talked about the importance of the programs to LGBTQ parents and our children.
Please contact City Council and urge them to support this measure. Thank you!
Letter to City Council from LGBTQ groups supporting the Sugary Drinks Tax
Here are some excerpts (reposted with permission) from PFP parents and prospective parents on their reactions to yesterday’s Supreme Court decision making marriage equality the law of the land in all 50 states. While we have more work to do, this is a time to celebrate!
E-mail Stephanie with your reactions and photos to her to add!
“Thrilled to be able to tell our son today that our family is not lesser! Thank you all who have worked so hard for this victory! I think I’m going to savor the moment, and expand my policy of Don’t. Read. The. Comments. to those four dissents. Love wins.” – Kerry Smith
“I remember in my early days as a professional activist I was in a meeting discussing the 20/20 plan (marriage equality in 20 states by 2020) and I was not alone in thinking it was overly optimistic and ambitious. So glad to be so wrong.
I hadn’t realized what a toll all the hate we’ve been faced with had taken until I opened a feed full of love. Let’s take a moment to celebrate this historic moment when history is moving in the right direction and let it fuel us to fight another day on all the other issues that still need work. #LoveWins #BlackLivesMatter” – Sandra Telep, PFP Vice-Chair
“Now it means so much more!” – Abby and Cheri, pictured with their marriage license in Delaware.
“In college back in 2003, I gave a speech in class about marriage equality. At that point no states had legalized same-sex marriage and the Netherlands were the only country in the entire world that allowed it. If I gave the same speech today I would get an F. And that is a good thing.” – Matthew Helm
“Legal at last with my husband Bryan Berchok. Thank you all for the support!” – John Ferraro
“What a great day for a great decision. Liz Petersen and I often comment that our role in this gay rights movement is to just do what we are doing. Raising our amazing kids and loving and caring for each other and our family. Other people around us see us struggling w/ homework, a new puppy, how much Pokemon should b allowed – all really important issues that all families have even straight ones. Being married allows life to keep going w/out having to explain who we are. Thanks SCOTUS.” – Shannon Dougherty
“So happy for my friends in my home state of Texas and elsewhere. Let’s celebrate today and get back in the fight for the rest of our rights tomorrow.” – Stephanie Haynes, PFP Director
“I’m going to like and share just about every gay thing I see today! Sorry, not sorry! You couldn’t tell me even just a few years ago that there’d be marriage equality in all 50 states by 2015. So thankful for those who tirelessly fought for our rights. #marriageequality #lovewins” – Sandy Gilardi, PFP board member
“Never thought I’d see this day in my life time! I can’t even tell you how over joyed I am.” – Doug Metcalfe, former PFP Chair
“Today history was made. Not because LGBT people fought and begged for it. It was made because the hearts and minds of our straight friends and family evolved and they took up the fight for us. It takes the majority. This is a victory for everyone. Thank you.” – Michael and Lou GrowMiller
by Sandra Telep
Today we are hosting a guest post by Amy Williams a social worker who specializes in helping parents understand how to navigate technology and the digital life that their tweens and teens are immersed in. This issue is fresh in our minds after last year’s conference theme was “Our Families and the Future” and there were many discussions about social media and their impact on our children’s futures. I hope our members find this infographic helpful. -Sandra Telep, Vice-Chair
Social media has been popular among teens for quite a few years now, but for LGBT teens and children of LGBT parents, the issues run deeper than that – one message copied and spread without their consent could reveal their orientation in front of their peers before they’re ready, and that’s a big problem. Unfortunately, many teens are exposed to shaming and gender stereotypes on social media everyday, and aren’t aware of the dangers until something goes badly wrong – but those who care are constantly looking for new ways of improving their privacy.
If your teen is worried about how they’ll be treated at school – which is perfectly understandable, given their increased chance of being bullied – you may want to keep a closer eye on what they’re saying and help them understand how a message they post without thinking could wind up hurting them. Effective monitoring software can help you keep an eye on what’s going on until they’re ready to handle it on their own.
Therapy Center of Philadelphia, in partnership with Philadelphia Family Pride, is launching a new eight-week information and support group for LGB women and transgender communities considering parenthood. It starts March 30th and will run weekly on Monday nights through May 18. A similar group for cisgender gay and bisexual men is in the works for another location in the fall.
“Starting a family as a queer or trans* person can be overwhelming and scary. The Maybe Baby group will help members learn about resources, share experiences, and support the process as they move along their journey into parenthood. TCP is thrilled to finally be able to offer a group like this in Philadelphia” said Alison Gerig, TCP’s executive director.
Maybe Baby offers an 8-week support group experience that will provide information from legal, financial, and medical experts, as well as emotional, social and community support. Members will come out with a sense of their options, how to navigate the process as a queer or trans* person, and connection with others on a similar journey.
“Our prospective parent information sessions at our past annual conferences have been very popular. This group is an attempt to provide a more comprehensive approach than can be done in a few hours in one day,” said Philadelphia Family Pride Executive Director Stephanie Haynes.
Meetings will take place on Monday evenings from 6-7:30pm at the Therapy Center of Philadelphia office at 1315 Walnut Street from March 30 to May 18. The group will be co-facilitated by Monique Walker, PhD, MFT and Julie Lipson, MA, MT-BC.
Cost for participation for the full eight weeks is $240/couple ($120/individual) for Philadelphia Family Pride members or $320/couple ($160/individual) for non-PFP members. Those not already PFP members can join for $25/year on our web site www.phillyfamilypride.org.
To register or for more information contact the Therapy Center of Philadelphia at 215-567-1111.
Therapy Center of Philadelphia nurtures individual well-being and personal growth by providing high-quality, affordable psychotherapeutic services in a feminist environment for women and transgender communities. We create this feminist environment through supporting client empowerment, collaboration, a de-emphasis on diagnosis, and on the recognition that the way in which we experience oppression is influenced and shaped by our concurrent identities.
Philadelphia Family Pride is a non-profit membership organization for LGBT parents, prospective parents and their children in the greater Philadelphia region.
by Sandra Telep
Each year for the past five years, Philadelphia Family Pride has hosted the Family Matters Conference for LGBT parents and prospective parents who are looking to learn, connect and share. It’s one of our most popular events and has become a valuable community resource. If you haven’t registered yet, here is why you should:1. Topic: This year’s conference theme is “Our Families and the Future” and workshops will span subjects like social media, family planning and marriage. There’s something for everyone! Read more about the day’s schedule and programming.
2. Childcare: Participating in conferences can be challenging when you have young kids – that’s why PFP includes childcare in the cost of registration! Now you can focus on the discussion and your kids can have fun.
3. Location: This year the conference is at The Philadelphia School in Center City – this central location ensures no one has to travel too far to attend.
4. Sponsors: We’ve got a great list of sponsors that are helping make all this available to the community at a low price! ($20/adult for PFP members and $30/adult for non-members) If this is out of your reach, scholarships are available. Be sure to stop by the sponsor tables to thank them for making this event possible!
5. Community: Meet and connect with other parents and prospective parents that have gone/are going through a similar journey to yours.
This year’s conference is shaping up to be fantastic and we look forward to seeing you there! Register now!
by Robin Matthews
I haven’t had to explain our family to anybody in a long time.
Our son has been in the same daycare/preschool for nearly five years and, outside of a passing comment, we rarely have to out ourselves anymore. But this year is kindergarten. New school, new teachers, new parents, new kids. It’s all new. And although we live in a fairly progressive town and I know we’re not the only same-sex-headed household, the sense of difference is more palpable than it has been in years.
I haven’t yet experienced any negativity; teachers, parents, and administrators alike seem to roll with it as soon as we disclose and, in fact, it has felt like it might even make us more desirable as friends to some families. But, despite the apparent acceptance, it’s clear that we are not the norm. I imagine it might be different in West Philly or Mt. Airy, but here in Delaware County, the families in the public elementary schools are definitely of the “One-Mom-One-Dad” variety.
I told myself that I would wait a few weeks to let my son settle in before I approached the district with my first concern: the back-to-school forms. On every one, I had to cross out “father” and write in “mother” and while I understand that it’s probably an antiquated state-issued document, there doesn’t seem to be any legitimate reason why it can’t be “parent.” I’m sure other similar things will arise as the year goes on and I will address those too. I am not looking to cause trouble or come barreling in with my big, gay mouth and stir things up, but I do see the need for some education and awareness. Our son has a lot of years ahead of him in this district.
Already, just in the first two weeks, I have outed our family to the parent of a classmate, my son’s kindergarten teacher, his before-school care director, and my co-homeroom mom. That’s four people — with many more undoubtedly to come. My son, while understanding that his family is not like all families, still introduces his parents without shame or anxiety. He has a Mama and a Mommy and figures it’s just as acceptable as any other pairing. At some point though, I expect he will be faced with some pushback when he outs his family to new friends and teachers. There will likely be, at least once, a kid whose expression is more disdain than confusion. An adult whose response is more scorn than curiosity.
As a parent, I have mixed feelings about this. On the one hand, I think it’s important to be unapologetically authentic. But on the other hand, I want to protect his tender heart. My hope is that with each passing year, the world at large becomes more accepting, more understanding, and — above all — more intuitive. That the “Muffins with Moms” and “Donuts with Dads” events become “Snacks with Parents” That kids and adults alike ask about family structures instead of assuming. And, at the very least, that school forms become gender-neutral.